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Fort McMurray bans Plastic Bags for James Cameron Visit

Fort McMurray, capital of the famous Alberta tar oil sands, passes ban on plastic bags in the wake of the visit of James Cameron, director of the movie Avatar, and hence an expert on global warming.

Bags from fast-food restaurants, pharmacies, liquor stores and bags used to purchase bulk items like produce are exempt from the ban. Unfortunately, Fort McMurray only offers fast-food restaurants, pharmacies, liquor stores, and bulk items stores. Also not banned are the gigantic monster trucks used by the local losers to drive to the fast-food restaurants, pharmacies, liquor stores, and bulk item stores.

Councillor Allen conceded:
"There's going to be some challenges implementing this...from my perspective when I see bags floating down the streets they're largely from fast food places."

In a related story, the Alberta government banned the smell of air fresheners in vehicles during cellphone use in order to increase road safety.