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FoGT Interview with Lord Monckton

Lord-Monckton
Lord Monckton, the famous climate skeptic denier and fake expert recently left no opportunity to put both feet in his mouth. Examples of his recent mishaps include Prawngate, Hitler Youth Gate, and Houghton Gate, but he has been voicy before: Chuck it yet again Schmidt! Since his amateur science paired with his ad hominem attacks constitute a liability to every serious climate change denial researcher such as Richard Lindzen (‘the world’s best climate scientist’ according to his lordship), we invited him into our Calgary Centre to give him the chance to set things straight and liberate him from his reputation of being a lunatic an excentric.

Here our interview:

Q: Is it true that wheat is growing as high as a telegraph pole in CO2-enriched areas?
LM: Principally yes, not only as high but also as far apart.

Q: What is the objective of the UN world socialist government?
LM: The exploitation of humans by humans.
Q: And what is the objective of the unfeathered-free-market ideology?
LM: Exactly the opposite! Read More...
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Marmotgate!

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Do Climate Zombies suffer from Grave's Disease?

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I strongly support Christopher Monckton and vehemently defend his right to look like a frog without being criticised for it. Frogs are under serious threat globally and need all the support they can get. Even if solidarity from Monckton is not particularly helpful to frogs, it's the spirit that counts.

Monckton's appearance is due to Grave's disease. As others have noted this may lead to mental impairment. Unfortunately, the media seem to be split between those who use his mental impairment as an opportunity for a freak show and those that are using an exaggerated version of validation therapy in spite of all the current experience showing that validation therapy needs to be undertaken with the subject in a controlled environment rather then in the glare of the national and global media.

Monckton's engagement with the community reflects great progress since the time when the mentally impaired were secluded in conditions reflecting their social status (see The Ruling Class (1972) starring Peter O'Toole). Monckton's illness is a tragic personal circumstance -- Monckton's great achievements in finding cures for AIDS and so many other diseases makes it particularly poignant.

Finally, frogs do not deserve to be compared to Christopher Monckton.

Prof Dr. Moritz Lorenz, Sarah Palin School of Geography, Economics and Quantum Computing, University of Narbethong.
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Ol’ Ma Gaia

Ah, gits weary
An' sick of tryin'
Ah'm tired of livin'
An' skeered of dyin',
But ol’ Ma Gaia,
She jes'keeps rollin' along!

Nobel Prize winning physicist Robert Laughlin has written an essay on deep time and the futility of even attempting to do anything about climate change. His thoughts were commented upon recently by libertarian journalist Neil Reynolds in the Globe and Mail. Laughlin’s argument roughly goes:

  1. The Earth is old, truly, staggeringly old.
  2. On one hand: Carbon dioxide from the human burning of fossil fuel is building up in the atmosphere at a frightening pace, enough to double the present concentration in a century. This buildup has the potential to raise average temperatures on the earth several degrees centigrade, enough to modify the weather and accelerate melting of the polar ice sheets.
  3. On the other hand: Climate change, by contrast, is a matter of geologic time, something that the earth routinely does on its own without asking anyone’s permission or explaining itself.
  4. The only practical thing we can do is to short Bangladeshi real estate.
  5. We’re screwed and entirely helpless but, not to worry, alarmists, ol’ Ma Gaia, she’ll jes’ keep rollin’ along.

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FoGT is Canada's and Australia's Premier Deniers' Website

The Friends of Gin and Tonic site has been online only since April 2010, but they have already achieved the number one status of Canada’s denier websites according to alexa.com, beating the Friends of Science in every category. According to rumours, the Friends of Science see this differently: While they consider themselves as honourable second, they see the Friends of Gin and Tonic as second last. Read More...
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CO2 is Marmot Food: Huge Economic Upside for Alberta

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A juvenile Colorado Marmot dwarfs mature Alpine Sunflowers
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Just published in weekly warmalarmist-anticreationist comicbook Nature is a ground-breaking (or at least, ground-hogging) study demonstrating the favourable effects of global warming climate change increased atmospheric CO2 on the number, weight and lifespan of Colorado marmots. Over the period 1976-2008, a time of both warming and cooling but monotonic CO2 increase, the marmots were observed emerging from hibernation earlier, becoming heavier during the lengthening growing season, producing more offspring, and living increasingly longer lives. This is not only clear proof of the beneficial effects of CO2 on some parts of certain ecosystems, it also has obvious economic implications for marmot-producing regions.

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Edgar Wallace's Face of the Frog attacks overcooked Prawn

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As we all have heard in the meantime, Lord Monckton writes about his critic John Abraham:

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“So unusual is this attempt actually to meet us in argument, and so venomously ad hominem are Abraham’s artful puerilities, delivered in a nasal and irritatingly matey tone (at least we are spared his face — he looks like an overcooked prawn), that climate-extremist bloggers everywhere have circulated them and praised them to the warming skies.”

FoGT may use this opportunity for another argumentum ad moncktonem: While we feel that Abraham looks more like the Dutch version of a smurf, Lord Monckton rather looks like Edgar Wallace’sFace of the Frog’ or a frog in a blender. Convince yourself!

P.S. We also wonder why our lordship uses a rather gay pink version of the House of Lords logo? Is every f*****g wanker allowed to do that?

Disclaimer: FoGT does not use the term ‘gay’ in a discriminatory but in a factual sense. As you know, we are rather open minded.

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Return of the Living Dead

The zombies are back. The reanimated website of the Friends of Science re-appeared Sunday midnight. A dead, slow moving container without any content added since before its demise three days earlier. Not surprisingly, the website did not disappear again at sunrise. After all, these little monsters love the sun.

zombies

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Global Cooling saves Life of Aussie riding a Crocodile

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BBC reports of a drunk Australian who attempted to ride Elizabeth Taylor a huge saltwater crocodile. The man survived because unusually cold nights and the biological clock had slowed the croc down. Had it been hot, the man would have been eaten for breakfast. The unusually cold nights point to global cooling which started in 1934 1998 2001 1st January 2002.

The Friends of Science (FoS) attribute the global cooling since the start of their 2002 fiscal year to decreasing sun activity. But, while the sun’s activity has been consistently low since the 1970s, and temperatures have risen dramatically since, we denialist Hayekian and Friedmaniac scientists wonder how much of a downward temperature trend is needed to stop a croc. Consulting FoS’ cherry database, their best fit line between January 2002 and February 2010 yields a decline of 0.12ºC ‘per decade’. Their most recent best fit line (which applies to the croc case) between January 2002 and June 2010 yields a decline of a lousy 0.03ºC. While we and Ms. Taylor the croc are still at a loss how long a decade should be, it proves that short term temperature variations (‘weather&rsquoWinking make a huge difference for short to intermediate trends - hence only long term trends larger than 30 years are meaningful for assessing global warming. Read More...
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On Bullshit - De Sterco Tauri - A Denialist Manifesto


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At warmalarmist website Skeptical Science, they’ve published a ‘scientific guide’ that purports to correct mistakes (huh!) in ‘The Skeptics Handbook’, that tour de farce of denial circulated by second-rate journalist brilliant amateur climatologist Joanne Nova. Guidebooks and Handbooks are all very well, but really they’re just recipe books -- collections of facts or nonsense lacking the philosophical underpinnings to enlighten disciples on how they should argue rather than just what they should say. We would therefore like to direct our readers to a perhaps overlooked dissertation that fits the denialist credo perfectly: On Bullshit, by Princeton academic Harry Frankfurt.

What makes Frankfurt’s exposition so relevant is the unassailably-argued distinction it draws between bullshit and lies. Now, certain hotheaded warmalarmists have in the past accused us deniers of the occasional lie. Such accusations miss the fundamental point that to lie, one has to know, and even care about, the truth. As Frankfurt says:
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New Book reveals polymathic Genius of Hayekist Scientists

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In "Merchants of Doubt: How a Handful of Scientists obscured Truth on Issues for Tobacco Smoke to Global Warming" Naomi Oreskes and Erik Conway reveal the scale of genius of a small core of scientists displaying innovative breadth unmatched since the Renaissance.

Following the
Hayekist principle: "Any science that implies the need for regulation must be wrong", these scientists have achieved a series of breakthroughs, demonstrating the safety of environmental tobacco smoke, the non-existence of the ozone hole, the feasibility of SDI (Star Wars), the continued effectiveness of DDT in the face of evolved resistance and, of course, refuting global warming.  For global warming they display the full strength of the Hayekist approach, going far beyond the conventional: "The warming is caused by the Sun and it isn't happening". Read More...
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Preserve the American Way

More communist, humanist, anti-business, anti-family, green subversives trying to destroy the American way!

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Warming extends Mating Period of Polar Bears

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Shorter antarctic winters cause earlier spring fever in polar bears and hence a longer mating season say researchers of the renowned Science & Public Policy Institute. “The buggers have been so horny in recent years” remarked Canadian sex educator Su Johannsen on the Monday Night Sex Show. This proves that global warming is alarmism, that sun causes cooling, and that it is darker at night than outside.
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MP3: Solar Schmolar Debate at GeoCanada 2010

Interesting debate (download MP3; 2:43 mins; 1.3 MB) following this GeoCanada 2010 talk:

Geochemical evidence for late Holocene Paleoclimatic and Paleoceanographic variability in Anoxic Basins, Seymour-Belize Inlet Complex, Central Coastal Mainland, British Columbia


Babalola, L.O, Patterson, R.T. and Prokoph, A.
Earth Sciences Department
Carleton University
Ottawa, Ontario
Canada

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A Lesson in Graphing and Trend Fitting from WTFUWT

Steven Goddard, as loyal readers of this blog will already know, has transformed Venusian atmospheric physics with his egregious (that word as used here means standing out from the flock not the derogatory unusually crappy) thinking on adiabatic heating, thereby rubbishing the greenhouse effect theory in our solar system.

Mr Goddard has now turned his penetrating insight onto that favourite bête blanche of the alarmists, the supposedly shrinking Arctic sea ice. Goddard performs some simple time series analysis on the JAXA data, disentangling all that confusing varicoloured spaghetti and shows how the long term trend is revealed by a linear fit. Thus:

wuwt godd

(Gentle readers of the FoGT blog may be confused by the last sentence in Goddard’s caption where he uses the rhetorical device of irony, whereby the literal meaning of his words is the opposite of what he really means to say.) Some critics immediately jumped on Goddard’s results and claimed that the California-sized increase in sea ice was an artifact of Goddard’s analysis and that everything depends on where you pick the starting point. I suppose that, taking this idea to an extreme, means that the JAXA data could even show “more proof that the Arctic is melting down”, which would be doubly ironic when you think about it.
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US City poisons innocent Canadians with CO2

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In an extreme escalation of the embargo on Alberta oilsands products by the city of Bellingham, Washington, the city of Bend, Oregon has taken a dramatic step. Tired of the bullbirdshit emanating from its Canadian residents, no doubt in a show of solidarity with their Bellingham colleagues, and presumably determined to put the lie to Friends of Science Myth # 7 ‘CO2 is [not] a pollutant’, Bend workers yesterday rounded up 109 Canadians from the local park they’d been living in, took them to a secret city facility, and exposed them to raised concentrations of this trace atmospheric gas until all of them died of natural causes. Reports suggest they are being prepared for feeding to the local homeless population (many of whom are likely also Canadian). Read More...
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Al Gore Sex Attack - The End of Climate Science

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The renowned climatology magazine “National Enquirer” reports that Molly Haggerty, 54, a red-haired masseuse from Oregon, accuses Al Gore of sexual molestation. Her 73-page statement was originally rejected by police because the woman had a significant credibility problem: she had attempted to sell her experience with Al to the Heartland Institute Exxon Mobile the National Enquirer - for a million dollars. The Enquirer refused payment however got a hold of the police files. Read More...
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